Don't tell me you haven't seen it... get yourself onto Netflix or Amazon or ANYTHING and get watching.
Since last summer, I've fallen in LOVE with Below Deck - an American show about "yachties" - people who work on boats. It's basically like Camp America, televised, on crack, with gazillionaires.
I'm not ashamed to say I've seen too much Below Deck - my parents bought the show on Hulu, that's our level of obsessed. Between the OG Below Deck, the Mediterranean version and the sailing season, I must've seen about 15 seasons back to back, but for those who aren't willing to pay (yet...just you wait), you can find seasons 1 and 2 on Netflix, and seasons 1-3 on Amazon Prime.
The food - Always bound to get your mouth watering or your heart pounding, the food is one of the most important factors in any of the charters - it makes or breaks your holiday, especially if you're expecting a Michelin starred chef and you get a trainee that puts grenadine on your oysters (if you know you know).
The chefs - Ben's the staple chef, on a lot of the seasons of Below Deck original, and he's British and just lovely darling. There's a few more chefs in the mix that I love but Ben is the original and the best. If I've learnt anything when watching this show, it is don't trust a female chef (and yes I will use this as an excuse to not cook for the rest of time). And if there's usually drama, odds are Ben either caused it or he's in the middle anyway trying to diffuse the situation and calling everybody darling. And he has the best laugh going. Darling.
The night out - after most charters, and there are about 10 of these every season, the staff get to go out for a night of dancing, or a meal, or sometimes the owners of the ship will pay for them to spend some time in a resort, and that is when you know shit is about to go down. Someone's always snogged someone they shouldn't or said something mean to another staff member, shit hits the fan and it is just great. The best chats definitely come out in the car ride home though, as in real life I suppose! I just wish they would tidy up after themselves in the taxis - I always feel bad for the drivers.
Towel cock - each charter group is led by a primary. Kate (my favourite Chief Stewardess a.k.a. Chief Stew of all time) and this one particular primary had a falling out. It's on Netflix/Amazon, I'm not going to spoil it for you because it is just too good. Get yourself online.
The scenery - whether they're in the Caribbean or the Med, the crew are working their asses off to a backdrop of gorgeous beaches, crushing waves and top quality landscapes. If that doesn't make you jealous while you're sat at your 9-5, I don't know what will.
Drunk guests - the only reason this job doesn't appeal to me. Watching the guests get so unruly, and the staff just have to run around after them...it's just hilarious watching from the outside. Look out for foam guy - he's a regular.
Captain Lee - there's multiple captains over the seasons, but Captain Lee from Below Deck original has got the be the best. He's the coolest seadog you will ever see, and if you're anything like my mum, he will be the eye candy on the boat.
So, have I convinced you to give it a go? When I say it got me through covid, I ain't exaggerating - being stuck inside and watching people struggle to work on a boat really puts things into perspective.
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